Listen. I may not have hair with magical qualities. But I also was not an innocent prisoner in a tower for the first 18 years of my life. Interesting, how our gifts and opportunities/situations seem to find a balance in this crazy world.

It is her 18th birthday. Her mother and father prepare her lanterns. Not a word is spoken...a tear escapes from her royal father's tired eyes, reflecting sorrow that hides a glimmer of hope. My own tears begin to fall...and continue to pledge allegiance to the tradition of faith....hoping for things that are not seen...THAT is magic. Real magic.

"...For now they saw the Prince. No one doubted for a moment who he was. ...Pale though he was from long imprisonment in the Deep Lands, dressed black, dusty, dishevelled, and weary, there was something in his face and air which no one could mistake. That look is in the face of all true kings of Narnia, who rule by the will of Aslan..." -The Silver Chair
I am a hopeless romantic...no, hopeful. I read these words written on paper, and felt these same etchings on my heart. Royalty is not something voted for, it is divine and deep within. We all have this potential. My future husband will be described by these words....

"You are, a cinema, I could watch you forever. Action, thriller, I could watch you forever. You are, a cinema, a Hollywood treasure. I love you just the way you are, a cinema." -Skrillex remix of Benny Benassi's "Cinema". I will be an academy award winning actress...in love, and in film.

I have been waging a war. It is hard not to fall behind enemy lines, when it is someone you love. Why drop an atomic bomb, when you can just watch my heart ache? I can promise the effects will be far more destructive. I have never felt the urge for violence so strongly, as when love is the motivation. If I smacked you with all the light that is in me, would you start to see? No, I suppose it doesn't work that way. Light...love...those must be OFFERED. They LIVE in someone who is open to believe.


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Truth confirmed: I have learned today that no matter who is the older of two parties, it is up to you to be the bigger person. You have the choice whether to lower to their level, or ask them to meet you at yours.

August 26, 2011
Truth confirmed: a spoonful (or 2, or 5...) of peanut butter does make the world seem better.
Haha, while I did experience this truth tonight, it falls in line after a LONG list of truths. So I shall bullet them for you, and for me. (I love that Shanti reminded me AGAIN to write in this, because inevitably I will learn in the writing of this...so no pressure on you, to get anything out of my blog, because we know even if it is only for me, it is fulfilling its' purpose.) Some of these truths may not have only been confirmed tonight...but in the last month since I wrote last...these truths have been swimming in my mind and soul...and some born tonight.

*we learn in SOOOO many different ways, venues, through different people, at different times, different paces... and in large part this is due to our desires...and our willingness to ask, and also to recognize.
*always have a pad and paper with you...you never know when inspiration will come. (at the Weepies inspiring show tonight...ideas and thoughts were coming with speed and clarity!)
*Risk. the worst thing that can happen is that any possibility of regrets will be crushed. It may hurt...but if the wright brothers had never risked...the birds would have a monopoly on the skies.
*Pain is universal. However, it doesn't necessarily do any good to compare between parties...while pain is universal, the experiences that invoke it or allow it to simmer, will be different. Our Heavenly Father's universal plan of happiness is still catered to us as individuals in the details.
*If you are feeling at the end of your rope...it means that you are close to your destination...or the desired fruits of that mortal experience...so HANG ON. Don't let go.
*No matter how much we learn and experience, no one will ever fully comprehend the depth, beauty, and magnitude of those life-changing moments. "I guess you had to be there," takes on a whole new level. WE must be the fruits of our experiences. They will appreciate our "aha!" moments in the changes we make BECAUSE of them.
*It is vital that we recognize our gifts and talents, so that we can use them for the benefit of others.
*Our plan may unfold in pieces, rather than in one completed puzzle picture. If you are trying to unfold a piece of paper, you cannot possibly see everything on that paper until it is unfolded...but that takes time...
*God works in patterns. He always has, and He always will. I noticed a negative pattern in my life...what do i do with that? What am i supposed to be learning? How can I change?
*It is exhausting to keep giving...loving....without receiving...however, that is not true. I receive what I need from the Savior...good grief, must i be reminded again, that HE is the only one that after truly had to walk alone? I am humbled...thank you.

Ok, this is quite a bit for one entry. I encourage you to sit down and write the truths you see around you...that you are learning from your circumstances, challenges, opportunities, and your responses to all of the above...isn't that what life is all about? Amen, brothers and sisters. :) And sweet dreams. Thank you for letting me use you as a sound board so that I could learn.

p.s. you may ask: "how did she learn these things?" the answer is: through the hard experiences. yes. i heard that too.